September blue
this name I gave
and secretly called out to you
for as fast as I passed out
so you were born and passed out to strangers hands
who laid you in a crib with no hand or arms
no breasts
no blood warmth of flesh
against your skin only
a blanket of acrylic
fake comfort
and I know how you must have cried
for your tears were mine
our eyes tears of September Blues
each year like clockwork you bury deep within my skin
around in fetal curl the memory of you breaks my heart
September blue
I cry out the loudest of silent screams
as this month once again repeats itself
the ground i stand on caves in beneath
burying me into the deepest darkest pit
no sound or sight
I loose everything within me
I feel every tiny piece of my skin dissolve into nothing
I loose speech I cannot say a word
I have no words left to say
I cannot move
there is no light in this place
there is nothing but a gut wrenching stab
I scream inwards the pain of loss grief
stand in the deafening silence within me
where am I
where do you take me
i fear this is where i left you
my dear beautiful baby blue
September blue
Depression is the name they have given you
I shun this name
its like the colour of death bluer than blue
I shun next year
I know you will come
For three months my grief is a tidal wave of tears
with no where to go I choke on my mouthless face of empty words
I suffocate in the silence of my minds memory
September October November
the first letter of each month S O N
was this coincidence or fate
each year my son comes back to bury me alive
I cant blame him
I was his mother
and I passed out when he was born
what sort of mother does that
when I opened my eyes you were gone
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In The Hive 